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TOP 23 REASONS WHY GENTRIFICATION IS GOOD!
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Found this on the street, seems as though it may have come from Michael 23...good stuff...read on:
TOP 23 REASONS WHY GENTRIFICATION IS GOOD!
23. Displacement builds character.
22. More art-lovin jocks driving Sublime-stickered Jeeps to break gallery toilet seats on 1st Fridays.
21. Locked 24hr surveillance dumpsters force downtown artists to buy pre-stretched canvases at Michael's; stimulating the local economy.
20. New gallery opens devoted entirely to the art of cell phone photography (selfography)
19. Remember METROPOLIS LLC?
18. Better looking crack whores.
17. Less ozone pollution warning from stampede of SUVs hemorrhaging from taxpayer-funded sports stadiums after the game.
16. The homeless aren't aesthetically pleasing.
15. Colangelo vindicated on his deathbed.
14. More source material for the Complainiacs.
13. If they're called lofts, you can charge $100k more for a fucking CONDOMinimum
12. Boutique opens accessorizing designer eyewear with glass color of popular 40-ouncers.
11. Influx of "real art" available at Z-Gallerie, IKEA and Thomas Kinkade: painter of blight.
10. T-GEN/IGC's new line of enhanced hipsters only have a 2.3km range from the control center.
09. There's not quite enough vacant $32/sf commercial space yet.
08. Because transvestite bars should only exist on those edgy HBO shows.
07. Evicted battered women lynch Wayne Rainey due to inaction. He's just REALLY misunderstood.
06. A Starbuck's on every corner!
05. We all know artists can get approved for a quarter-million dollar mortgage. Or that they own their own storefronts.
04. History, schmistory! Welcome to Phoenix.
03. SPENT CRAP = RENT GAP
02. Because, with the right marketing and promotion, people will pay good money to feel they're part of SOMETHING.
01. Less Trotski, more tchotchke!
EXTRA BONUS REASON
00. Jerome Dubois will be freed up from his busy blogging schedule to save the burgeoning Boise, Idaho contemporary art scene.
